Behindfulness for Beginners (A Parody Guide to Letting Sh*t Go, Finding Inner Peace, and Staying Present)

Finally, holding onto your zen doesn’t have to end when you shut the bathroom door. Behindfulness for Beginners hilariously presents the first-ever mindfulness journal specifically designed for those all-important, but often ignored, five-, ten-, eh maybe, fifteen-minute silent sitting sessions that we all do each and every day (serenity willing). So drop trou, take your seat, and prepare to enter a world of peace, relaxation, positive reflection, and fascinating facts about this sacred act:

• The Lost Art of Turtle Breathing: Learn the practice of cleansing kami breathing on the john; a technique named for turtles that can, for some reason, breathe through their butts.
• Look Inside: Reflect on just how much life you hold inside you—like the 100 trillion bacteria currently living in your digestive tract. 
• Let That Sh*t Go, Literally: Interactively track just how much baggage you can shed each day (hint: the average person unburdens themselves of between 1 and 2 pounds daily).

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