Overview
Two therapists analyze their own relationship to help untangle the common and frustrating barriers many individuals face on the road to a happy, loving, rewarding partnership.
Many of the clients who end up in our respective therapist offices thought they were doing relationships rightāavoiding the white picket fence, focusing on careers and experiences over babies and legally-binding documents, choosing someone after they āfound themselvesā first. However, like clockwork, around their early to mid-thirties, these clients show up at our door. Why? For the first time, they realize that they dislike their relationship and are frustrated by their partner but know that another break-up wonāt fix things. They recognize a pattern of relationship misery that has them finally looking in the mirror asking, how do you make a relationship last?
It took us many relationships, our own inner self journey (which weāre still on), therapy, therapy school, and helping thousands of people with their relationships, to learn to have better ones ourselves.Ā Vanessa woke up at 31, after ending an engagement and moving to Los Angeles. John thought he woke up at 35 after his divorce.Ā But he didnāt truly wake up until he was pushing 40.Ā
In Itās Not Me, Itās You, John and Vanessa dissect their own relationship to help readers figure out theirs: what their relationships were like in the past, what traumas they carried into the new relationship, and how they work on growing together to foster a healthy and long-term bond.
The surprising truth is falling in love is more about you than your partner. Itās more about challenge and growth than comfort and ease, and roots donāt grow from wishful thinkingāthey grow in the soil of communication, curiosity, patience, and understanding.
Itās Not Me, Itās You is for anyone looking for real advice on relationships that takes both sides into account and discusses relationships with the honesty and clarity we all need.
This book title, It's Not Me, It's You (Break the Blame Cycle. Relationship Better.), ISBN: 9780063206311, by John Kim, Vanessa Bennett, published by HarperCollins (September 6, 2022) is available in hardcover. Our minimum order quantity is 25 copies. All standard bulk book orders ship FREE in the continental USA and delivered in 4-10 business days.
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